Garden State

I watched Garden State with my sister today, and what a good film. I've been wanting to see it for so long, and I'm glad I finally did. It's such a good commentary on life and love. A story about a guy who goes through his life completely numb because of one small mistake he made as a child then stops taking his pills and meets a girl who is not afraid to do something completely unique that no one has ever done before. Very cute and thought provoking...and if you haven't seen it yet, stop reading now because I'm going to give away the end...it was great especially when he tells Amy he has to leave because he had a lot to figure out on his own, but ends up coming back to find her because he realizes that she is what feels like home and when he goes through this he wants her with him, and vice versa. Gives every girl hope that the right guy is out there and will realize that it's not always about figuring things out on your own, but having someone you love there by your side along the way. Overall, I'd give it two thumbs up.

Anyway, that's my two cents for this Black Friday. No shopping for me, just helping my sister with her hair and trying to relax...now being prodded into packing, which I hate. Ah well...back to NYC in two short days.

Happy Turkey Day!

So its Thanksgiving and you know what that means...family, friends, food and thankfulness. Now I traveled to the ATL for this Turkey day celebration to spend time with the extended fam. Good times and good food, let me tell ya...homemade macaroni and cheese, collard greens, ham, friend turkey, red velvet cake, sweet potato pie, potato salad, the works! Gotta love a family get together. And after dinner of course there was dancing...it just wouldn't be my family otherwise. Its times like today that remind me of who my people are (my family roots that is) and where I came from. Its nice to have that reminder every now and again since I'm so far removed from them. And my little cousins are the cutest! I'm thankful for family get-togethers.

And on an unrelated note, I was thinking about the movie "How to Lose a Guy in 10 days" on the plane yesterday and how it is a testament to how hard you have to work to make a relationship work. I mean, here you have Kate Hudson trying desperately to be the most annoying girlfriend in history, and Matthew McConaughey determined to make her fall in love with him. He puts up with her craziness (albeit for a bet) and in the end she really falls in love with him. He didn't give up at the first sign of difficulty, but toughed it out with her and let me remind you, they had some really great times along the way (remember BULL$%@# at his parents house on Staten Island??) Anyway, I was just thinking about that and how a lot of people these days seem to have forgotten the hard work it requires to make a relationship work. Ah well...

Oh, another question...what would you do if you felt yourself beginning to develop feelings for a close friend of the opposite sex? I've been in this situation before in college, and didn't quite handle the situation expertly (I tend to get stupidhead when I like a guy, which means I get all girlie and awkward, which you can read on my face and body language from a mile away). I'm not, by any means, a master of these situations, but I ran into this friend's twin brother the other day and it reminded me of this, so naturally, I thought I'd share.

Random thoughts...please share yours. And hope you had a happy turkey day! Gobble gobble!

New York at Christmas

New York during the holidays is absolutely beautiful. If you haven't seen it, you should definitely visit...I mean, the holidays have barely begun, but the snowflake lights and "gift wrapped" buildings are just stunning as the sun sets on the city illuminating the holiday spirit. I'm so excited about the tree lighting at Rockefeller Center as well. Apparently though, it's a big to-do and soo many people are there you have to camp out to even get near the tree to see it being lit. I may just go a different day, but I MUST see the tree this year. It kind of reminds me of Silver Bells in Lansing. Everyone comes to the capital and watches the parade then they light the tree and people get nuts and candy at the Peanut Shop...ah, the memories. Now all we need is snow, and it will be perfect.

Anyway, just thought I'd share since I spent the day walking around Rockefeller Center admiring the lights and store displays. I'll add photos after I see the tree...can't wait!

Single and OK?

Who knew with every job you have you learn something new about what you are trying to get out of your lifetime career?? So that's me right now. I have definitely learned at my current job that I'm not so good at being one of those people in the background who makes things happen but gets no recognition. You got me...I've always known that about myself, but this job definitely reaffirms that. I like to be in the spotlight of sorts...at least to get recognition for the jobs that I do (...not just the mistakes that I make). The next job definitely needs to have both more responsibility, more recognition, and clear objectives (I'm a big picture sort of girl).

In other news...if you check two posts ago, there is a link in the comments section to an interesting website...well, I don't know if interesting is the word I should use, but it'll do. Now this website basically talks about why older (late 20's early 30's) single people looking for love are just doomed, because the percentage of the available population looking for long-term committed relationships is diminishing because we have become a "hook-up culture". It's about the saddest thing I have ever read, frankly, and I'm choosing not to believe it. The unfortunate thing is that it must have gotten under my skin because on my walk to work I thought..."what if there isn't a guy out there looking for a girl like me?" That is kind of sad, but me and my sister were talking tonight, and I came to this conclusion: I may just be too okay with being single that I'll never find someone because I'll never look hard enough. I guess I'm just relying on that guy to fall into my lap, or friendships to turn into more (read: friends of friends theory).

Anyway, just my typical thoughts on work and dating. As always, please share your comments.

Two Cents on Dating

A friend of mine said something to me today that I thought blog-worthy:

"I can't believe you can't find one of my friends to date."

Now, to give you a little background, I was telling him about one of my successful dates from online dating. He thought the guy sounded pretty cool, which he is, but couldn't believe I wasn't interested in any of his friends (which let me clarify is not true...I like them, they just never call me).

So this whole conversation reminded me of the friends of friends theory. Again, I believe in it fully, but online dating has introduced a whole new dimension to the dating scene. One is able to see if a guy is even interested in a person with similar qualities and characteristics as them before even spending any time or energy on the games involved in the dating scene at say a bar. Don't get me wrong, online dating is by no means a replacement for the good old traditional dating, just a helpful addition.

The point is, dating is exhausting but fun and although friends of friends are a great way to meet people and get to know them without as much awkwardness there seem to be some other effective ways to meet people too.

My two cents on dating...

Love? Sex?...Read on, you'll be interested

Here's a question for ya:

Can love exist without sex?

So I know those of you who know me are thinking "WHAT?!!? Gibbas talking about sex" and I have to admit I had an internal debate going as to whether or not I would write about this, but what it boils down to is this: I have to write it because it's a real issue that people face daily so I have to be true to that. (And let me clarify that I mean falling in love and saving sex for serious commitment/engagement/marriage, not abstaining from sex forever in a relationship).

Where did this thought come from, you may be thinking...well I was watching Love Inc. today and it sparked this question because they're supposed to be finding love for people but today's episode focused on, among other things, the main character trying to have sex with the guy she was seeing. Also, being young and single in NYC also sparked some interest in this topic. Apparently, the scene here is largely about taking people home from the bar and sleeping with them. Again, if you know me you know that's not me. Now, the question is, can you fall in love with someone or grow to love them without sleeping with them? I mean, so many people expect that you sleep together after the second or third date and the relationship grows from there, but what about intellectual stimulation? I once read that you should marry someone who you love to talk to because one day that's all you'll have left. How does sex play into that? Can you find a guy who is willing to not sleep with you in favor of getting to know you better and falling in love with you first? I have to hope. A lot of guys...and girls...automatically assume that you're not interested if you don't sleep with them soon after you meet them. In my humble opinion, sure sex is a key part of a relationship, but it is not the end all and be all in deciding if this person is the one you want to spend the rest of your life with. It seems that there are a lot of other factors that come into play, like shared interests, conversation, personality, etc that could shape lifetime compatibility. Perhaps people are just not thinking like that at this age...people have always told me I have an old soul. Who knows.

Just thoughts to ponder...and if you have any thoughts, comments, opinions, please do share.