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December 25, 2009
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December 23, 2009
I'm soo ready to go
I'm soo ready to go home (to see Adam that is). Being the only child home sucks! And the pangs of being a child of divorce suck!
December 21, 2009
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December 18, 2009
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December 09, 2009
Crash!
Today I fell off my bike for the first time...as an adult. I was riding to class with a box in a bag hanging from my handlebars and I just plain got tangled up and ended up on the asphalt in the middle of an intersection. Good thing it was right in front of the hospital and a police officer happended to be directing traffic right there.
Its a weird feeling crashing on my bike. I wasn't embarassed, I wasn't really hurt, I was actually kind of proud. Bizarre, I know. But its like conquering a fear, riding on the street is always scary because of cars, the rain, etc, but this fall shows me that I can survive. Not that I will everytime, but that it's not the end of the world this time.
It's also ironic that my first crash was caused by none other than yours truly. I'm always worried that I'll get side swiped by a car, or left turned into when cars aren't paying attention to me, but nope. I will crash because of my own ignorance and lack of preparedness. Silly girl!
I'm happy that it happened the way it did with no cars behind me to run me over and a slow speed. Sadly as the hours pass my body gets more and more sore. I woke up at 11:30pm (yes I went to sleep at 8:45pm because i was exhausted) and now I can't go back to sleep. I discovered that I have a fabric burn on my right shoulder likely from where my sweater pulled as I slid across the street. I have a bruise on my left shin. My neck is now sore (think whiplash) My wrist is getting more stiff. And I managed to get a scrape on my right elbow through my sweater (which is still in one piece).
Quite the stresful morning to be sure. I'll be glad when I'm home in by BF's arms. That's all I look forward to these days.
Its a weird feeling crashing on my bike. I wasn't embarassed, I wasn't really hurt, I was actually kind of proud. Bizarre, I know. But its like conquering a fear, riding on the street is always scary because of cars, the rain, etc, but this fall shows me that I can survive. Not that I will everytime, but that it's not the end of the world this time.
It's also ironic that my first crash was caused by none other than yours truly. I'm always worried that I'll get side swiped by a car, or left turned into when cars aren't paying attention to me, but nope. I will crash because of my own ignorance and lack of preparedness. Silly girl!
I'm happy that it happened the way it did with no cars behind me to run me over and a slow speed. Sadly as the hours pass my body gets more and more sore. I woke up at 11:30pm (yes I went to sleep at 8:45pm because i was exhausted) and now I can't go back to sleep. I discovered that I have a fabric burn on my right shoulder likely from where my sweater pulled as I slid across the street. I have a bruise on my left shin. My neck is now sore (think whiplash) My wrist is getting more stiff. And I managed to get a scrape on my right elbow through my sweater (which is still in one piece).
Quite the stresful morning to be sure. I'll be glad when I'm home in by BF's arms. That's all I look forward to these days.
MLIA
I have found a new love for mylifeisaverage.com. So many of their posts make me feel less like the lone ranger out here in life! Like this:
"Today, my mom told me that PMS is like a dementor. It sucks the happiness of everyone around, but chocolate makes it all better. MLIA"
I also have to confess, everytime I read MLIA I say "my life is AWESOME" in my head. I also secretly think of MLIA moments throughout my day. Love it!
"Today, my mom told me that PMS is like a dementor. It sucks the happiness of everyone around, but chocolate makes it all better. MLIA"
I also have to confess, everytime I read MLIA I say "my life is AWESOME" in my head. I also secretly think of MLIA moments throughout my day. Love it!
December 05, 2009
Hormones :-/
I hate hormones! I thought I had fought them off this month, but alas...watching wedding dress shows made me lose it! (Along with snarky emails from classmates) Hopefully some changes next month will make it better. I just can't make any big decisions in the next few days because I am not clear minded.
Blech! I hate this and really want sugar.
Blech! I hate this and really want sugar.
December 04, 2009
Where does this leader fit in?
Seems that I can't sleep a lot lately. Not so much fun with all this work to do. Tonight what's plaguing me is the same that's been pulling at me for the last few weeks (except when I was home with the bf...he seems to put this stuff all in perspective) what kind of leadership role do I want in school? If you know me you know I always gravitate towards leadership roles. I want them. I like them. I'm good at them. But here something is different. I feel like I know myself better, yet I find myself fighting losing battles often. It's not the type of environment where I know that I can be the most effective that I can be. It brings out frustration, which is something I am working on, but leading in that type of environment won't allow me to be effective or make the best decisions. I think the reality of the situation is that I need to find what I am passionate about and not just lead for leaderships sake. It's gotta be that thing that makes me talk fast, get animated, make my heart beat fast. What is that? I mean I LOVE sustainability. I am really interested in diversity issues. I hate babying people and babysitting people which it increasing feels like I have to do. Perhaps I need to take a back seat to leadership (cha, right...if you know me that's virtually impossible...I'd sooner create something for myself to lead than lead nothing).
I told myself when I came here I was going to trust my instincts and something about whats going down doesn't feel right to me. I'm ok with that...well not okay with it, but I know enough to remove myself from it. There are certain people that just don't seem right, and I don't want my name associated with them. There are others that you can tell are good people. Now don't get me wrong, my intuition is by no means the end all and be all, but it generally steers me right (and when I don't listen, I go wrong).
I just need to decide what I want to do and stop tormenting myself about it. I need to be at peace with the thing I decide to pursue. What is that, you wonder? Very good question. If I knew exactly at this point I may let you know, I may not. I just need to work it out first.
I told myself when I came here I was going to trust my instincts and something about whats going down doesn't feel right to me. I'm ok with that...well not okay with it, but I know enough to remove myself from it. There are certain people that just don't seem right, and I don't want my name associated with them. There are others that you can tell are good people. Now don't get me wrong, my intuition is by no means the end all and be all, but it generally steers me right (and when I don't listen, I go wrong).
I just need to decide what I want to do and stop tormenting myself about it. I need to be at peace with the thing I decide to pursue. What is that, you wonder? Very good question. If I knew exactly at this point I may let you know, I may not. I just need to work it out first.
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